Streak of black

Now that Belle's found so many errors in my previous work, she must be thinking that my work has little quality. Thing is I seldom make mistakes but when I do, she has to find them out! I am so tired even though working here is relatively trouble free.

Allien thinks me a superwoman; that she only need go through processes only once with me before I capture them with my photographic memory. See, I don have one.

Sparks between me and Jm last night, gosh...I'd better contain it a lil more in future. Haiz...wass with this back streak? Thought the fringe cutting was supposed to help???

:(

Time and its consumption

My work stint in TJ has led me to make one conclusion: that Singapore CTSians work harder than Tianjin CTSians.

Why do I say so? Here are my observations, which lend support to my claim:

- The Finance Controller of the company is often late for work (I know cos I take her ride)
- Some of my colleagues begin their day by browsing their favorite websites
- Ladies take sweet pleasure in combing their tresses in the washroom
- Ladies braid each other's hair in the washroom and others watch with glee
- Conversation is a must when you run into someone you know in the washroom
- Conversations about work that is not for solving work issues
- An hour's lapse is normal for replying an important email
- Work ends at 4:30pm here (while SGs' end at 5pm)
- Hardly anyone works overtime
- There is such a thing as a post-lunch stroll (around the office building)
- Those who are not strolling are playing cricket or basketball
- One colleague commented that workplaces are "bad" when they have no gym facility (for post-lunch use)
- Employees have the liberty of chatting leisurely on the phone for half hours or more
- Some make it a point to pay daily visits at their lunchmate's cubicle for a half hour tete-a-tete
- People can take for annual leave (3 days in a row!) without giving prior notice
- IT Senior hands work to IT junior without informing the relevant people involved
- IT junior postpones an important task that can be done in a minute to the very last minute
- Senior management takes time off daily to drive out for lunch
- Junior management people drive out periodically for lunch
- One colleague suggested having a time-consuming "hot pot" lunch!
- The colleague doesn't consider "hot-pot" time consuming
- We actually had a "hot pot" lunch!

A lonesome TJ day's record

Had mostly vegetables for lunch today. Food in the canteen is as usual, pretty atrocious but surprisingly the vege was fine. A good thing there was good company to make the food more appetizing.

The lunch and afterward stroll (Chinese practise strolling after meals) with Syna is indeed fascinating. He is the most polite and easygoing gentleman I think I ever came across and his forthcoming and frank style I know will leave me with lasting impressions always. Being initially from Beijing, he makes refreshing perspectives; since like me, he was able to relate from an outsider point of view how different living and working in TJ is while drawing comparisons from our native lands. He is married (3 years since) and that makes conversation all the more lighter, leaving flippancy totally aside. He is one of those people whom you know you can drop all pretenses and just chat freely with also because he seems completely contented and at peace with whatever he is doing and whatever he is not. This sort of people makes you most believe there are more ways to live life than a glamor seeking one, and that a life forever humble can be worth living. His only hope he mentions, where work is concerned, is that our manager comes by more often so that they can close the distance they often experience between their working booth in TJ and their management booth in SG. Maybe I can help relay his feedback.

Oh...before I forget. I need to record the warmness CCH delivered over the airwaves yesterday. My first text reminder to him started an sms tirade that is most heart warming (at least to me):

"Hey Boss, pls keep to yourself that I am in China k...Thanks!"

Sure no prob since I haven't told anyone. Bring me a sourvenir though! And what secrecy are you doing up at Tianjin?

"Haha...I'll bring you your sourvneir since I divulged I'm overseas. Now you know my reason for going incognito? Kidding..."

I known you long enough to know that's really you. The weather is still quite cold in Tianjin, or are you at another city?

"And I've known you long enough to know you the sort to ask souvenirs from someone who has just lost her wallet and is
freezingly lonely in TJ :)"

Now I will ask for a bigger souvenir! Haha...I thought you were travelling with your boyfriend. So you mean you are on a
personal exploration expedition? You better come home, before you run out of cash to call a taxi to the airport.

"For that kindness, you will get your bigger souvenir! Smart move! Haha...no worries for the cash cos insurance's got tt. You
better fret about your phonebill while I; my loneliness..."

No need to worry about my phonebill. It's the first day of the lunar month, you can do some star-gazing! And think about
warmer memories of our past thailand trip. Do you have your CD player? You can listen to my fav. album (while at it)!

"I wish nature's kinder as to rest the mist for stars and I don't have a CD player, only an MP3 that's not tough enough to
weather the cold. NEVER trust Creative! So I will play memories as you say. How about you? Finished your codes?"

No. I have to 8 deadlines to meet this week, plus my FYP; this is my cyclic busy phase. I only hope my magic works this
time. I've been to Tianjin twice myself, quite fun, roads with shops on both sides... I could share my experience with you.

"You must have been at the more bustling end of Tianjin. Share your memories with me next time then! And hope your magic is not as bleak as my wish for stars. I am back at the hotel, gonna defrost in a warm shower. Nite!

Yeah, I hope my magic will work. Drink some hot tea while you look out to the window tonight, the stars will be great!
Goodnight!

"Am looking! Think I do see a small star in the distance, your magic'll work!"

His words warmed this lonesome sould stuck in Tianjin.

Oh, there is something quite magical I need to share! Yesterday was the 2nd day of the 2nd Lunar month and according to folks' say in China, cutting your hair yesterday was supposed to bring goodness for the year (that explains the fireworks and firecrackers sounds I heard on the entire way home from dinner last night). And guess what? I'd borrowed a scissors from Syna and cut my fringe (cos it was growing quite wayward) that very afternoon before I left work!

Yes; in case this baffles you, when you are lonesome and all alone away from home, every little happiness counts.

Tanggu to CNN

Ok, I am sorry I made the previous entry, cos I found a good shopping mall yesterday eventually after taking the plunge, and cab to go all the way down to Tanggu (pronounce "Candies + Aunt on your dad's side"). I mean, I found some... many in fact, good shopping malls where it is 3 km from where I'm put up at. Tanggu (stupid name really, I had to say it three times to the cab driver before I got it right and don't laugh! I'm sure you'll be worse off), is like the ORCHARD ROAD of Tianjin I tell you. Its like Beijing's wangfujing where me and Jm sojourned the last day of our stay at that city.

And I bled real cash yday just going down the lane of shopping malls; down and up the lane that is. I bled real cash, it was like a hoermmoerage (I know this is a spelling error, I am too lazy to go check) and I couldn't stop! I never knew knew I could be this reckless or this impulsive. Though I still think its worthwhile, since the designs of the clothes you can get there, is just....amazing. I am sure nowhere in Singapore can clothes be this fine. So I'm sorry I'm not sorry...

I was so busy shopping I forgot to take nice shots of the place, else I can share or maybe, I had no spare hand for cameraction is truer.

Back at "home" otherwise, CNN, HBO and Starmovies are the 3 channels helping me kill the tedium, to make up for the lack of conversationalists anyway. When I feel smart, I'd turn to CNN, when I am just bored and bored and bored, the other 2 channels work better. I've caught 3.5 movies since I'm here. 0.5 cos I caught one halfway which I never figured out the title even. So you can imagine which mood i am in more often. Erm, but CNN is still top choice though, if you ask me... No, really. I am considering begging Paul and J add this channel in place of some dumb one I'm sure they have (sorry girls...) gee..

Gonna sign off...being couped up the whole day and I badly need some action, in the name of gym.

And don't get me started on the misfortune that just struck me.... Shit comes, it comes, yes even to angels. Chuckle...

Hunting in the Cold

I am officially bored.

But not so bored till I can't blog (hey it rhymes!)... heh.

Anyway I've learnt that walking out in the streets when it's just 6 deg. C is not a smart thing to do when your entire suitcase obviously wasn't prepared for 6 deg. Celsius. I almost fainted from the cold, despite having 2 layers on, geared with boots and a scarf. I didn't imagine China'd be still this bbrrrring departing December... I miss the time I had Jm's warmness all around me...

Oh and it doesn't help that I was out precisely for the reason of mall-hunting and upon detour (cos I know I won't make it back alive if I don't), I discovered that the only mall within possible walking distance (taking count of the cold) is the one I've always shopped at, which is nearest to the hotel.

D-A-M-M-I-T.

Thank goodness there was the comforting dinner. Check out what I had below. I am definitely going back for more :)

Worthy bao dinner

6 xiaolongbaos
6 mini fried beancakes
1 apple juice
----------------------------
15 RMB.

My goodness me, I couldn't believe I found this bargain that is so, so cheaper and nicer than the KFC meal that was asking for 56 RMB!

Did I mention that the standards of the xiaolongbao is better than the ones we get at Crystal Jade's?

Oh stupid me, xiaolongbao orginated from China.

Tiresome TJians

The mystery is unravelled. Tianjin is really not as good as Beijing. Nor is the office branch here half as comparable as the one back at homeland. Initially I'd imagined BJ folks to be warm and friendly but alas, they turn out like the omelettes I had for lunch today. Nice on the surfaced, overdone and burnt underneath it.

Speaking of lunch, mine today's positively sucked. Well erm...how can I describe the food? Let's just say the spread and quality was like what grandma makes on her ever-worst days (plus ever-worse market grabs). Lunch ambience? Prison-like. We were eating food from metal trays with separators for each "dish" (very prison-style) and on top of that, it was handed out to us by mean-looking women (female cooks) behind cream (supposedly) tiled cookhouses cut in the middle by tables overlooking a kitchen; oily, run-down and unkempt. They dished food using not ladles but bowls, not the rice-sized ones but 2x that circumference so you can imagine the portion. The lady ahead of me in the queue (which btw was made of 5 rows of 2s) was handed out a full bowl of rice and she asked for another scoop, much to my horror! Is there some kind of hunger plague going on in the factory's I'm not aware of? I'd have given her my rice had she not seemed in such a hurry.

I bought my share (share as in the portion is so much we can all share!) using the company-issued Foodcard and although it totalled just 5.50 RMB, I realised that I'd already paid the most among my lunchmates. The rest puchased minimal cafeteria fare and supplemented those bought with what they'd packed from home. I thought it was weird that they bothered being embarrassed when I told them to take my dishes freely since it was one of them who got the card for me in the first place. It's paid for by OUR company so why act all weird??? OR maybe because it was prepaid they feel constrained. I have to remind myself I can't explain their logic half of most the time.

Been here for 3 days now, and aside from the nice cosy hotel they're putting me up at, this work-travel has had no redeeming quality for me. Mandy told me to be thankful for this planner position and opportunity to travel out here for training. But I think I have little I need be thankful for.

The TJians around are mostly a self absorbed abd ignorant bunch, save for a minority younger group, who then are still self absorbed but less ignorant. The traffic scene here most mirrors the average TJ-Chinese's mentality when dealing with Life; DON'T stop going where you want or give way even if the traffic lights say you should. Keep honking other cars when you are on the roads. Whoever has a louder horn wins and gets to hog the lane. Else, be BIG, cos if you are, you don't even have to haggle with the tedious logic; just have your way or your lane, NATURALLY. One Chinese told me it is impossible being polite and giving way here, since there can be no end to Giving once you start (there is just too many cars and people). And when you bother with coutesy, you end up just stalling your own agenda and never seem to get anywhere. So his logic was, just don't give way.

OK. Well, if you follow this logic right through, Chinese never get married, nor do they ever bother with jobs. Cos for the former, there is just too many people and jobs, you never get it right anyway so why bother?? O.K. That's your problem really. Don't give way, don't marry, don't work for all I care. When I do meet with folks like that, I just go out my way to irritate them. Cross the road SLOWLY when I finally get the green guy, IGNORE car honks and when necessary, raise "some" finger (be sure you are close to your hotel though, in case you need to run). The Chinese in TJ seem soullessly caught up in their warped mindsets and beliefs. They need to find out that the world is larger than their office's cafeteria.

Fine. Let's just say that not all Tjians are poker faces, some of them are actually nice and polite. They happen to be a group that more conservatively keep to themselves and seldom bother with other people. There are people like that in my office and they are a couth, if not young bunch. Maybe that's how they stay untainted; by themselves and on their own.

So counting down to the day I get to go home.

Chemistry and dinners alike

Dinners to me are sessions I cleanse my mind from work with, where I form and correct plans, where I break from mundanity and cross over to the dream-likeness state I believe all creativity and balance stem and is rooted. Tonight, I am suffering the choke-full aftereffects of Dian Xiao Er feast. Been about 2 hours, and usually, usually, dinner'd have digested by now. Perhaps I'm not used to eating at late hours and for two nights in a row already, I have lined up late appointments for scrumptious dinners. Even if the soul can handle it, the stomach sees ill-fftted to.

Last night's dinner was with JM and tonight's was with Veron and Belle; all three persons I have excellent chemistry with! Though with the latter ladies, chemistry is entirely incidental, and it's surprising not only because conversations had been mostly in Mandarin and I am not used to it as a tool of communication so often (even though i am darn good at it), but also since it's not in my custom to have company at dinners, much less enjoy them.

This pizazz since unfounded, is unhealthy and should be avoided. Must be avoided. In fact, all association with all mundanity should be. But I need not worry too unfoundedly and too much I suppose, since I'm crossing over to Demand's and away from all direct and future affiliations.

Call me vain, call me proud, whatever you may. I just like being on my own, doing my own stuffs, finding out what interests me, doing what I need to and like to, setting and crossing personal challenges. And associations best be from a distance, better still, quietly respectful and gently yielding.

That or maddeningly passionate. Burning and emating such flames that anyone who accidentally pays a call is scorched and inflamed as well. I do believe in passionate relationships. Natural chemistry that is biting, witty, in sync, loving, with the right sensitivity that makes the entire being alive and wholesome, sexy and veracious. It is not easily achieved. Yet the sheer possibility of it existing should cause anyone to abandon all fear of association to forge and create relationships that'll bridge to all the destined ones.


I'm weird I know, and I can't help it. And I'm still freaking full.

Msn Intruder

It's always a dilemma when your social and private lives meet. Thanks to Golf theory.

I never know what to do when colleagues ask me for my msn addy...we already meet in the flesh, why meet online too?? The logic simply escapes me. But as usual, I just think, outwardly, I'm too much of a doll to turn down such friendliness.

That means I have one less avenue for bad gripes and yammering... ...

TJ, TJ here I come!

I'll be going to Tianjin!!! :D

Been waiting forever for this posting and new workscope. Finally lady luck is smiling again...!

And I hear TJ is quite cosmopolitan now, at least the place I'm going is!

Check out this pic I wiki-ed, of a pretty-damn-cool skyscraper at Tianjin Economic and Technological Development Area or TEDA, where I'll be working at. Oh I hope I get to work at a desk somewhere in a building like that!

Oh wait, there is still the passport thing I need get done. Bummer.

Life interrupted

Felt the silent tremor this afternoon. The movement of the ground. Ripple effect of Sumatra's 'quake. Actually I missed the first wave and only "caught" the second wave that came in an hour after P's sms of the initial. Else, I would've reacted what my colleagues had, rush down and out of the building. Or maybe not, given my previous experience.

Fingers crossed, I can only imagine the scale of the richter this quake belted; that a distant neighbour should feel the wobble, and the plausible injury to lives and livelihoods. These are lives already in exguity, and austerity of their situations exacerbates with each calamity. My mind reels with debate on the authenticity behind God's love for Mankind, a natural question that seem to come to me each time a cataclysmic event like this occurs.

I recall the first time I felt such vibrations which; I wasn't aware then, are really remnant tremors of a huge earthquake in the region. It was at 12am plus and when I became certain that it was physical vibration, my fear ensured I jumped the gun to rouse the entire family awake to go to ground one, thinking the flat was coming down (I was later told running was a stupid thing to do even if the building were indeed collapsing).

My point is. Fear is real. And real fear jepodizes logic and immobilises intelligence. It turns one into a foolhardy moron driven only by instant instincts. And in exigent situations, one best stay calm or pray their instincts are veracious.

Clearing up my thoughts and impelling attention away from dreadful events that Human's are too powerless against, I texted JM something sweet and replied P; the two anthropoids on Earth I devote to most, above and beyond explanations of natural causations or even Gaea's wrath, before tarrying on my way.

Gaea: Goddess of Earth, in Greek mythology

Panthera Leo

It is commonly known to resemble an upside-down "?" or a Sickle. Regulus (Latin for little king) is its brightest star, which can be found at the base of the question mark.

The constellation Leo is also known as the Lion.

It was said during ancient Egypt, when the lions of the desert came close to the valley of the Nile during the dry season whenever the river flooded. The Sun during this period can always be found in Leo; hence its name.

Ancient mythology for Leo tells of Hercules' first tasked labor, which was to kill the Nemean Lion; a fierce beast that took on the form of a meteor from the Moon and devastated the countryside of Corinth. Hercules had no trouble finding the cave with two entrances where the beast was known to reside at. As he approached the cave, he spotted the lion and aimed an arrow at its heart but it bounced off the Lion, not scarring it. Angry, Hercules sealed off one of the entrances to the cave and pursued the lion right in through the other. So immense was his strength that he seized the lion and strangled it to death by ramming his fist down its throat. He then flung the beast over his shoulder in proof to King Eurystheus that he'd completed his task. Hercules then skinned the lion and used its tough hide as a protective shield as well as for exhibitionistic reasons.

So angry was Hera; Goddess of Feminimity at Hercules' success that she raised the soul of the lion high into the sky, and created the constellation Leo.

Henceforth, the ancient Sumerians, Babylonians, Persians, Syrians, Greeks, and Romans, all recognized this constellation as a lion.

Truth and the Dreamgirls

Emotional people nurture capabilities and little respect for rules.
Rational people nurture a respect for rules but require the essence of time for breeding talent.

Dreamgirls is a tale that struggles to show the differences between those who reply on their heart and those who turn to the grey matter above when making decisions, and how the consequences of either approach roll out.

It tells of Emotionality as opposed to Rationality. And shows there is but a dimunitive diferentiation in betwixt and between the two.

For while Rationality enables Relations, Emotionality allows for Love.

And while Emotionality induces Ingenious creations, Rationality makes for its continuation to an eventual Legacy.

Emotionality induces Intensity, Rationality permits Variety.

Rationality yield flawless plans and Emotionality attests plans' execution in mastery.

For where Emotionality spares beauty for The Moment
Rationality really manages beauty for A Lifetime.

But Relations can be truly hollow without Love, and Love need be measurably alloted in relations to build lasting relations. Stupendous and random Creations lays out the structure for an eminent Legacy to build itself upon; with the latter its glory can perpetuate. Intensity in any field shapes anatomy for the field's possibility for Diversification, yet obsession can be counteracted only when one deflects to examining variety. No Plan is productive without Execution but execution is aimless without direction. "What is" outlines "What is to come", yet there can be no present accomplishable that can be meaningful without turning to studying its significance for the future.

Exquisite emotions in truth stem from an unblemished heart and incorruptable rationalities spring from a virtuous mind. The two are perhaps quite one and them same.

Quite deep... bah, go do the show.

Sights from Lunar Omega

Only today did I learn that Yuan Xiao refers to the yummy glutinous rice balls. Lol

peanut filling... Delicious.

"Descend punctual, Hypnos!"

Horrors of horrors is what describes when ailments of Insomnia spill beyond the body to afflict life.

I overslept and was late for work.

After a frantic rush to office, I smoothened my tousled mood by plugging on to 2 hours of Enigma's "Endless Quest", which just about summarises my endeavors to attain inconsciousness these days. Yes, days cos my body seems to have formed an ajustment to calling out for rest only at wee hours approaching dawn (past 4am).

Anyway what is truly disgruntling is people's concern for my sleepinability/insomnia drama in the form of nags and periodic reminders. I D O N ' T N E E D R E M I N D E R S T H A N K S. I want to fall into a dead-to-the-world-exhausted, REM-free slumber too hello?? A chat is more useful to me if you can afford to care.

Hypnos, Personification of Sleep, Nyx &Thanatos. Like Death, he is usually depicted as a winged male, and in the span classicism period with wings in his hair. He is seen with Death carrying the bodies of heroes from battlefields or crouching over sleeping figures

I sought out Google for counsel on my sudden crepscular nature and came up with the following litany of explanations (and after analysis, I realised that mine is just a Transient form, not Accute or Chronc, thank God!).

Parasomnia - Nightmares, sleepwalking, violent behavior while sleeping, REM disorder

Mania or Hypomania - Symptom of Bipolar Disorder (check a previous entry)

Dehydration - Basically caused by crap that is in you rather than your poo

Pain - Any form of pain, external or internal ensures you (not Rusky) is the nightkeeper to your abode

Hyper-thyroidism - Excessive multiplication of Hormones responsible for body's BMR, physical tolerance and metabolism (energy)
Examples: Graves disease (80% etiology); a thyroid disorder unknowned trigger by an antibody auto-immune reaction, Inflammation of Thyroid Glands, Tumor growths or cancer (Hope not!!!)

Other reasons cover side effects from medication, stress or emotional upheavals, physical or mental illnesses

As well as the more plausible ones :

Clinophobia - Inability to rest due to anxiety and physical pain
what with odd abdomenal aches...

Circadian rhythm sleep disorders - Insomnia due to social disruptions or delays to sleeping phases
Examples: Jet-lag, Shift-work.
Pretty obvious which of the two affects me, though i don't credit high possibility.

Consumtion of Stimulants - Caffeine, Nicotine, Sugar, Alcohol or certain Medication, Pills or Drugs
Hmm...calcium supplements, hormonal drugs included?

Lack of Exercise - Exercising 4 - 5 hours prior to bedtime aids sleeping
Em...it's obvious I'm no regular at this.

Among the available proposals, Jm's take was the last one. In his opinion, my daytime preocupation is way too idle and I need physical exertion to drain the surplus and undissipated energy. Since there are limited sport activities recommendable for twilight engagement (unless you consider grooving at St. James gym-out) he suggested Jogging, (which happens to be an activity I won't ever ever allot energy to, even if spare energy overflows in globs; unless of cos you revamp the sport away from monotony which you can't).

Or maybe he knows me well enough to know I sublime every "jogging session" to its less deplorable form, Walking.

Still, take a hike, I prefer Insomnia.

*sigh*